Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Don't Need Any IRA's, Apparently I'm Nonqualified

Let me tell you a story. (No, I didn't get this from the "Burn Notice" commercial)

Guy has a great job. Guy loses his job. Guy searches for other jobs, including one that's even "secretarial" in the hopes he can at least gain some type of employment.

Guy gets email after email saying that he's not "qualified" for any of these jobs.

Guy reads qualifications on job posting: Answers phones, arranges travel, performs reports using Microsoft Office Word, Excel, Powerpoint, 2-3 years experience as administrative personnel.

Guy reapplies for position, thinking there must be some mistake. After all, his most excellent resume shows all the bodacious stuff he's experienced in, and knows he's well qualified to make coffee, answer phones, and scratch his head while patting his tummy.

Guy gets second notice stating he's not qualified again and is a complete turd for reapplying for the same job.

Guy initiates jihad against infidel company that has dissed him twice.

I'm not allowed to disclose the specifics for fear of corporate snipers hiding in the nearby trees, but this is what I have been through everyday for the past month and it is getting old fast. This tells me that I'm either a complete worthless turd or the job market...oh, how shall I say it?...SUCKS.

Thank God we're out of the recession. I'm so glad the media cleared that up for us.

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