The Reversal

Allow me to introduce myself.

No, I've no time for introductions. Let me tell you my dilemna:

I used to work in an office environment until about a week ago, when my boss announced that due to economic downsizing, I was being let go as a casualty of the current recession. He didn't say it in that many words, but really what I heard was, "Blah blah blah, you're out of a job."

I had to come home that day and tell my wife the sad news. She took it rather well. I only had to use the smelling salts twice. Seeing as I have been an employee of six years at that job, I am now in the process of adjustment.

Since we have two toddlers who are full time work without pay, it has come to my understanding that if I cannot find employment in two months time, we are going to be in a rather unfortunate situation. My wife got on the horn and called up her former employer. As if God Himself was beaming a ray of sunshine down upon us, they happened to be in dire need of part time help. My wife told them she would be there as soon as they told her to. They told her to be there abruptly. This was, in my mind, an act of God. Call it coincidence, but I know better.

Consequently here I am, looking for gainful employment online and any other way I can. Oh, did I happen to mention that now since Mommy is working four days a week, yours truly has become the children's keeper? I am now the official diaper changer, breakfast maker, book reader, TV monitor, butt whacker, lunch and dinner reviser, hand washer, cookie giver, and Potty King. (I am the Potty King. I can do anything.)

And it isn't so bad after all. The children are rather pleasant. Unless they are awake, that is. They normally get me up about .000000000001 seconds after Mommy walks out the door to go to work, and then it is creative chaos until she gets home. This wouldn't be such a bad situation if I wasn't looking for employment and taking a class at the same time. If I try to get on here, they are crawling all over me like monkeys on a banana tree. My son Nicholas, the Fell Beast or "Nazgul Bird", likes to constantly torment his sister Claire until she whacks him upside his head, and then he comes crying to me like she is the naughty one. This tactic would work if I was perhaps blind and deaf. On the other hand, if she sees him with one of HER toys, she is going to go over there and try to take it out of his hand, and then I await the dreaded Fell Beast sound emitting from Nicholas' mouth. As I sit here, listening to the Fell Beast, the immortal words of Frodo from the Lord of the Rings enter my mind: "I cannot do this alone."

NAZGUL BOY, AKA Nicholas, or Pooka



Princess Claire

I know what you're thinking as you read this: Ha Ha, bigshot Dad who thought his wife did nothing all day while he was at work and now the situation is reversed, and he gets what he deserves. Allow me to correct your train of thought. My wife may have had to care for the children, but she was not in dire need of employment and did not have to apply for jobs during the day, and she was also not going to school. This tremendously complicates the situation.

But believe me, as negative as I have made the circumstance sound, I think perhaps it is a blessing that I get to hang out with my little babies for a couple of weeks or perhaps months (hopefully not for all our sakes). I think they do love me, even though there is obviously a new sheriff in town. I have made it a pact not to be angy at them, but to be patient and loving. Although the occasional spoon-whacking-on-the-buttocks occurs when they are being super bad.

Now I must go, cuz Nazgul boy apparently needs some attention. See you later after they go to bed.